Friday, February 15, 2008

The Long and the Short of It

We had our first trip to the Doggy Emergency Room last Friday night and I am hoping it will be the last. By nature, I am squeamish. ER's? Not my first choice of places to visit....doggy or otherwise, though after my experience I can say I prefer the people ER.

Last Thursday night I was up with darling Emmitt all night as he was really sick and throwing up every hour or so. Not surprisingly, as I was cleaning up all of these messes, I saw all the things he had been munching on throughout the week: the corner of a purple sponge, part of my husband's slipper, yarn, wood pieces from our entertainment center and God only knows what else. I knew I'd be seeing all these items again at some point so I can't say I was really shocked.

After finally getting to sleep at 5:45 am, I was awoken by Samantha telling me it was time to get up. The time: 7:40am. The time we have to leave for school? 8:00am. That left me 20 minutes to wake up Megan, get myself up and ready for work, give the girls breakfast and get their lunches packed and stuff together.

We get to school and work on time, miraculously, and I muddle through the day quite tired. All I can think about is making it until 4:30 so I can go home and take a nap.

However, that was not to be the case. As I am leaving work, I get a frantic phone call from my mother who is babysitting the girls at our house. Apparently, when she got home from picking the girls up from school, she saw that Emmitt had a very long piece of string coming out of his ass, when will I be home and call the vet.

I called our vet and was advised NOT to pull said string as it could saw his intestines. Proceed to Seacoast Animal Hospital asap. Wonderful. That nap I had day dreamed about all day? Gone.

By the time I arrive home, my husband is there as well. He is standing at the kitchen sink washing a very long piece of poopy string he has just cut from Emmitt's ass. Bag it up and let's go. As my husband had his son and was bringing him to laser tag, he watched Samantha and Megan while I headed to the animal hospital. Apparently, my mom wanted to come with me but was frantically searching for her cell phone (I don't know how she lived without one for 65 years....she's worse than a kid chatting with her friends.). I didn't realize she was coming so I took off, only to be called 10 seconds later to come back and get her. Aggravated I spin the van around and head back to get her. As Emmitt is already sitting in the front seat (naturally with a towel under his smelly, string ridden butt), mom has to sit in back.

We arrive at the ER, frazzled and stressed, and check the poor baby in. The waiting room is the size of a shoe box. As sick as Emmitt is, he is still trying to greet every animal and human that walks through the door and I am trying to harness him in so he's not jumping all over everyone.

Finally, after sitting in an examination room for a while, the vet arrives. After the mandatory questions she decides to give Emmitt a rectal exam. Oh this should be good. My job is to make sure he continues to stand up by holding onto his underbelly. My mom is sitting in a nearby chair. There is NO way in hell I am going to watch what she is doing, nor is my mom who is just as grossed out as I am, so we both look in the opposite directions. The first thing that makes me want to pass out is the stench that is coming out of his butt as the vet is reaching in there to try to see if she can get the string out. Thank God I am already close to the ground should I take a header. Then, Emmitt starts crying. It's not like he's a child and you can say " See what happens when you eat things that you shouldn't? You get a hand up your ass." Naturally, there's not much you can say.

So the vet is able to get out another foot of string until she can't pull anymore. Really? You couldn't pay me enough to do that. My options? Take an x-ray to see if the string is wrapped around his intestines. If so, we're looking at surgery. If not, we are looking at a laxative and some patience. Back out to the waiting room where I am continually trying to keep him calm and not let him near anyone coming in. I decide to take him out for a walk around the premises. I am hoping that if I walk him for a while, he'll poop and the rest of the string will emerge. Of course, there are a thousand animal scents all around the outside so he has to stop and sniff every few feet. After 20 -3o minutes, and several fruitless attempts, he squats, and he poops the rest of the string out! Or at least I hope it is the rest of the string. I go inside for a glove and baggy and happily bring in his poop......well, poop covered string. Just as a precaution, I still request the x-ray. Peace of mind is NOT overrated.

After what seems like FOREVER, the vet lets me know that everything looks fine, there is no sign of any more string remaining. They still give him a shot of "pepto" to settle his stomach as he was up all night vomiting and he was a bit dehydrated. The shot was in his upper back and made a huge bubble under his skin. I was assured that it would go down to normal in a few hours. Still, I was freaked out.

Have I mentioned that I am squeamish? Yeah.

In between all this chaos, families were coming into visit their sick pets, pet owners were bringing in more sick puppies, and those that had casts on their paws. The last straw for me was when the door opened and a husky walked in with porcupine quills sticking out of her entire face, all around her mouth, eyes, etc. I thought I was going to be sick. Smelling salts anyone? Yes, I gave birth twice but I am still a big baby! It is such a sad, depressing place and I pray that I never have to return.

We left the hospital around 7:30 but had to stop and buy hamburger and rice for Emmitt because his belly was still unsettled.

So much for a quiet night in. When all was said and done, the string he ate was at least 6 FEET long. He is lucky he got that all out. Where he got the string, we still aren't sure.

Needless to say, I am praying for a quiet weekend. :)


The Aumanns said...

Oh my goodness!! Emmitt - give mommy & daddy a break!! Been to the doggy ER - twice. Yup. lots-o-fun.

Kim said...

DEAR GOD SUSAN!!! I would seriously have a heart attack then vomit if six feet of crappy string came out of my dog's ass. Add another reason to my "glad-we-don't-have-a-dog-anymore" column. I hope Emmitt is feeling better and that you got a nap!

Sarah said...

oh my god that is the most ridiculous story I have read in a long time. I couldn't stop laughing, yet a felt bad for the little man!!